Personal Stories

I was born into a Christian family but had no interest or love for the Lord. At the age of ten, while studying overseas with my sister, I developed a passion for football. I wanted to pursue it as a profession and was determined to fulfill my dream as a football player.

I am 46 years old and had suffered from major depression throughout my entire life. It intensified in my late 30s.

Being weak in my studies while being in the best class in my school put a lot of pressure on me.. I tried my best to study hard as I needed to do well to get into a good college. But since the beginning of the school term, I could not cope with all the subjects and kept failing in my class tests.

I have been a Christian for years and have been serving the Lord for more than a decade now. In 2013, I slipped into depression because I suddenly began fearing for my future. I also started having anxiety attacks that were a result of toxic relationships.

Some time ago, I started having anxiety and panic attacks. I couldn’t sleep, my heart was in pain, and I had no appetite. Bouts of fever would hit me, and I often had to rush to the toilet.

My family and I first heard you on television in the spring of 2009, when we were holidaying elsewhere in England, United Kingdom. We do not have cable or satellite TV so we were interested in watching the God channels when we rented a holiday home. We “happened” to turn the TV on to the right channel when you were just starting your program.

I’m thirty-four years old and was involved in full-time ministry for thirteen years. For seven years, my husband and I pastored a local urban church in Chicago. We conducted Bible studies, seminars, teachings, trainings and outreaches. We saw people saved, water baptized, filled with the Holy Spirit and went through discipleship courses. However, we saw very little lasting fruit.

I had always wondered what freedom looked like, so I tried searching for it in many places but could never find it.

My children were raised in a Christian home and saved at a young age. A couple of years ago my 20-year-old daughter left home, stopped communicating with our family, and ventured into drugs, cults, and other inappropriate behaviors. She was also suffering from anxiety and panic attacks. It was devastating to see her like that because if you knew her, she was the sweetest, most beautiful daughter anyone could ask for.

Growing up, I just wanted to be a good person who did the right things and avoided doing bad things. I got married and had 2 sons. But my husband and I had frequent fights, leading me to contemplate divorce many times. The future seemed bleak as I struggled with fear and anxiety, not knowing how I would be able to pay off the home debts or how I could afford for my kids to go to university. As a result, I struggled with a very bad temper, stress, and depressive thoughts.

About 18 months ago, I lost my boyfriend in an accident. When I got the news he passed away, I had a nervous breakdown. I felt like I couldn’t breathe and move anything in my body. When I reached home, I went straight to bed to read my Bible but while reading, I threw it across the room yelling, “How can God let my boyfriend die?” From that point on, I stopped believing in God even though I grew up in a Christian home and knew all about the miracles of God.

I was raised in a family where from a young age, we were told that when we sin, we would suffer retribution. Our family was not at peace and my parents would quarrel almost every week. The fights would often escalate and involve threats of violence from both parties. As a child, I was traumatised.